The Gluttony Ends

I have a sort of ritual that I do every year and it goes a bit like this.  

From the end of summer to after the holiday season I stop caring about anything even remotely related to health.  I eat like a death row inmate and drink like a neighborhood hobo.  If it is deep fried...I gobble it right up.  If it has bacon involved, get out of my way or you may get hurt.  I tend to drink heavily during this time as well normally due to the beloved Steelers run to the playoffs or any other reason that I can think up to get my drunk on.

To my surprise this causes me to gain a bit of weight.  I don't understand why acting this way comes with a penalty, the LORD gave us all of these things to enjoy but yet makes me expand like a marshmallow in the microwave. (If you have never done that give it a try it is REALLY cool and delicious if you wrap it in bacon first)

Well folks the holidays are over and as tradition has it the time has come for me to step on the scale and assess the damage which is exactly what I did on Monday, it went a bit like this......

I got out of bed with the idea of seeing what my starting weight would be this year.  Of course I strip down to nothing, I didn't need that extra underwear weight skewing the results.  I place my feet on this new scale that arrived at our house a couple of months ago close my eyes and exhale (emptying your lungs has to make you lighter right?). I look down and open my eyes.......

HOLY SHIT....This FU*@ing scale must be broken!!!  There is no way that I weight THAT MUCH!!!  I panic and jump off of the scale.  I figure that it is the full bladder that I had at the time that is causing this extremely high number so I hit the bathroom and push myself until my bladder feels like it is physically coming out of my pee-hole.  

Ok back on the scale.....NO CHANGE!!!  WTF!!  I am going back to bed.  Of course going back to bed is not tolerated by my wife or children so I take out my anger by stomping around the house all morning before dragging my obviously fat ass to work.

Great Monday HUH???

Anyway the post-holiday dieting has begun.  Now since I was in my teens I have been able to add and subsequently drop weight very easily.  Now that I am in my mid-thirtys {GASP} I wonder if this remains true.  I guess I will find out over the next couple of months.  

I have developed the unrealistic goal of being able to run a half marathon by summer and for those of you who know me, I am solidly against running of any kind unless it is a sporting event (running is not a sport stop kidding yourself) or something is chasing me with the ability to do me bodily harm.  But alas that is the goal I have made.  I have a plan of attack....

• Drop the initial 15lbs which should be easy or it has been in the past.  Asking my knees or ankles to support my fat ass is just out of the question at my current weight.
• Begin walk /  jogging at regular intervals. (3 days a week)
• Some other sort of cardio activity for the other days of the week taking the seventh day to rest. (resting was good enough for god so why not me?)
• Increase the distance and walk to jogging ratio on a weekly basis until I am running 5 miles around the neighborhood.

This should be easy right??

I will keep posting about my weight loss and progress through-out for your pleasure.  Plus updating my progress will be a motivating factor for me.

I was thinking that I shouldn't post my weight but I am not a chick so ....

Starting weight = 257 (Jan 18)

Current weight  = 250 (Jan 21) 

Encouraging words would be wonderful and you all in one way or another caused me to blow up this way so you owe me!!!!  THAT'S RIGHT...I BLAME YOU ALL FOR THIS!!!  It simply can't be my own fault.